Having wasted a good amount of time this week in pondering the physics of 9-months-of-life-in-a-bag-that-actually-looks-smaller-every-time-I-get-it-out, I find myself returning to the list provided by Odyssey. On reflection, I think a man must have written this.
It includes (and I quote): 4 or 5 t-shirts. For 9 months. I'm going to smell like my brother's hockey bag if I wear 4 shirts between April and January. So--10 to 15 it is!
Underwear: as much as you think you need. WTF? Who averages out how many panties they wear in 9 months? Maybe I should make it a poll--how many do you think I need?
Waterproof trousers and jacket. I'm sort of ashamed to admit that I do actually own a terribly practical and stylistically middle-aged waterproof jacket now, but I draw the line at waterproof trousers. I do not need to look like a bass fisherman.
2-3 Pair of Trousers. Again, my jeans are going to be able to walk to New Jersey on their own after 6 months. Solution? Magic pants! Yes, girls, I now have convertable trousers (see above). They're trousers! They're shorts! No, wait, they're capri pants! Sadly they are two sizes larger than what I usually wear, but I blame NorthFace for their inability to cut well, rather than the size of me.
Shoes. This is a difficult one. Obviously the hiking boots, with their crucial pink accents; naturally the cute Havaiana flip-flops; then it all goes to hell. The list suggests jandels. I don't know what that means. Do I take cute ballerina flats for days when I can't bear hiking boots and all they imply (fitness, outdoorsy-ness, interest in exercise--these are things I am not comfortable with). Or slightly more practical but still cute Skechers sort-of sneakers? God, this is so hard!
The rest of the list (it's short) includes a headscarf "for the ladies" and three pairs of socks. And that's about it. Granted, given the amount of medication and first-aid stuff, I won't really have room for anything else. But I do have my own syringes now! So there's that.
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